Chinese Coal Fires Ruin Christmas for Swedes, Goats

By December 21, 2006Global Warming

And the Dutch are terribly worried. Global warming brings us all together this holiday season.

First, vast underground coal fires in China and elsewhere are spewing tremendous amounts of carbon dioxide into the atmosphere, presumably — lots of presuming here — exacerbating global climate change. Andries Rosema, director of the Environmental Analysis and Remote Sensing Company in Delft, The Netherlands, observes:

The CO2 production of all of these fires in China is more than the total CO2 production in The Netherlands…This amounts to 2-3% of the annual worldwide production of CO2 from fossil fuels, or as much as emitted from all of the cars and light trucks in the United States.”

Which spells a moist doom for the traditional Scandinavian Christmas decoration, the gingerbread house.

STOCKHOLM (AFP) – Sweet-toothed Swedes who have spent hours constructing edible Christmas gingerbread houses are seeing their creations collapse in the Scandinavian country’s unusually damp winter, suppliers said.

“The damp weather spells immediate devastation for gingerbread houses. The problem is the mild winter,” spokesman at Sweden’s leading gingerbread wholesaler Anna’s, Aake Mattsson, told Swedish news agency TT.

To be fair, Mattsson does not blame climate change in the story, it’s the headline writer who opines, absent facts, “Gingerbread houses latest victim of global warming.”

Seeking revenge, Swedish rowdies have taken to the streets.

(12/18/06 – STOCKHOLM, Sweden) – Vandals tried to set fire to a giant straw goat in central Sweden but failed to burn down the traditional Christmas monument, which has been soaked with flame-resistant chemicals, officials said Friday.

The overnight raid was the season’s first attack on the 43-foot-high Christmas goat in the city of Gavle, 90 miles north of Stockholm. The goat has been burned down more than 20 times in the last 40 years in what has become a yule tradition.

Thereby worsening global warming. It’s a horrible cycle.