Friday Follies: Wanna Sponsor a Divorce….?

By February 3, 2006Friday Follies

fridayfollies.jpgThanks to the blogger’s apprentice for spending his day surfing e-Bay rather than working on blog stuff. He came across this nugget, and it really is a gem.

Everyone knows that sponsorship has gone crazy. From Tiger Woods’ fabulous Nike endorsement deals to the naming of stadiums, Bowl Games, just about everything under the sun. There weren’t many things that weren’t up for sponsorship grabs except maybe personal tribulations. Not to worry, you can now sponsor that, too.

This guy, from Las Vegas, is apparently getting a divorce. From the looks of the photo, he appears to be a real go-getter, bursting with ambition. He even has his skateboard right there with him, ready to go. Have opportunity, will travel. He has posted on e-Bay the opportunity of a lifetime: He’s looking for corporate sponsors for his divorce. “I’m living in Las Vegas”, he says, “with no clue what to do with my life.” Wow. How many people in Vegas can say that…?

In any event, opportunity abounds. Here’s his pitch, and our comments in [brackets]:

When I sign my divorce papers, I’ll wear your companies logo, put up a banner behind me, anything you want, I’ll even let your lawyer handle the paper work. Can any casino say they ever gave someone a “good” divorce? Well they can now. [Hard to argue with that logic.]

What about my first date as a single guy? I’ll drive your company logo on a car, I’ll wear your logo on a hat, shirt, pants, bag. You can even pick the woman and the place. If you have company cars all decked out, I’ll drive the thing for a year. Really, anything, try me. [Do we have to?]

Help me rebuild my life, from my room to my health. wait, I smell reality TV! [We definitely smell something, too….]

There are shows about fat celebrities and boy band singers getting a second shot…what about the story of an average guy rebuilding his life, his health, going back to college, pulling himself up from with his boot straps! A feel good story! Come on, they sent Tommy Lee to college, why not someone who really needs it? [Tommy Lee needed it, too.]

I’ll go on radio shows, do interviews, anything you want. I’ll be your company’s number one fan. I will sleep, eat, and live your company. [That’s what we’re worried about.]

How about “So and So Sponsored my Divorce!” tattooed on me? The possibilities are endless.

Since he’s getting divorced, we thought he might be the perfect poster boy for the AFL-CIO, since they split earlier this year. Any other suggestions? Just do it? Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful? Indeed, the possibilities are endless.